In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
