i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
