mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
why does every cop we meet know your name?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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