It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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