i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Randomize
