It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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