I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
