Dual....:-)
i already hear my dad disowning me
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Randomize
