Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Bring me that man meat
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
