How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
