I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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