Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Randomize
