just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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