I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
