Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
