I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
