Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Randomize
