im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
