We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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