Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
the liver wants what the liver wants
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
