I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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