I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
