I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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