My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
