So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize
