Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Randomize
