i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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