love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
