I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
