just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
