Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
