hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
