i just google imaged poop.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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