where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
