love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Randomize
