In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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