Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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