is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
