it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
