Cold hands, warm shart.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Randomize
