I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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