Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize
