Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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