The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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