I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
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