Ambien. No doubt about it.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
