I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
That accounts for only three of the penises
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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