I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
