so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
