TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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