Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize